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I've been awfully quiet - haven't gotten on MH lately. For those of you who don't know, my STBX (soon to be ex) husband left me in June. A week after Father's Day to be exact.
I don't like talking about it too much because it just brings me down. I'm over the fact that he no longer loves me - and in all honesty, we weren't happy, but I knew we could have been again, and I was willing to stick it out.
As for an update: He is now seeing one of my former good friends - yes, even though he denies it, I believe this has been going on for some time. He has "sleep overs" with his new girlfriend while my children are there. He also leaves my children with her when he goes hunting. And no, there is nothing I can do at this point. My lawyer says all we can do is keep an eye on the situation.
I personally am hanging in there...barely. I got recertified to teach, but there are no jobs. It's taking FOREVER to even get set up as a substitute. It's not as it once was. Hopefully it'll pick up here soon. But still, even as a sub, I'm only looking at probably about 5 months of work out of the year. But since I have my Master's in teaching, that is the standard of living income the judge will hold me to. So I have to find a teaching job. Sigh...
I don't even want to talk about my bipolar disorder - but you can imagine what this whole thing has done with that. The sad thing is, I was starting to feel really good before my ex left. He just had to hang on for another month or so. But now I'm back to where I was.
It is said that divorce is like a death, and having lost my dad two years ago, I can say that this is true.
So that's about it. There's other stuff - good stuff. My kids, my writing, and dating. I like dating. It's nice to make boys pay...for anything right now LOL. I'm KIDDING. But getting a dinner for free every now and then is pretty nice, since I can't afford to eat out anymore.
I do some writing. Unfortunately the anxiety I feel right now leaves me pretty much paralyzed - I hope this subsides once I start working. But I have been doing some article writing and I've been picked up by an online newspaper called Sunday Newscape - my "page" is http://sundaynewscape.com/content/category/1/21/16/ if you feel like checking it out. Whatever - the picture they have up of me is horrible. I need to tell them to change it, but my articles are all listed there.
That's it. My life in a nutshell. Sorry I've been absent, but some days just getting up and being a mom takes all I have. It's supposed to get better. That's what everyone says. God says "Patience through tribulation" and we know how much patience I've got. So I tell myself to trust God and trust the process. Eventually I'll be okay, right? That's what I thought.
__________________ "If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it."
It WILL get better! As you know I left my husband in November of last year. Found out about his girlfriend and said SEE YA! It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. Starting over sucks! I left my husband, my home, my life, and started from scratch. I had to find a new place to live, figure out how to live on one income and support my child, oh...he even took my car, so had to get a new car too!
I am finally at a point where I am truly happy. I do not care about him at all anymore, don't miss him, don't want him back, don't have any of those feelings. Just the other day, he was talking to me, which he had been doing a lot of lately, and out of the blue I say to him...."I love being single, Thank YOU!" then there was silence on the other line for a good 30sec or more. So I say "so...call Sadie and figure out when you want her to come over, talk to you later, bye!" It felt sooooo good to say that to him, to let him know I am fine, and I am so over him, it isn't even funny. The best part was the silence, he didn't even know how to respond!!!
You will get to that place, it will take time, but when it happens, it feels great!!!
I'm so sorry to hear that you have to go through this. Hang in there. It will get better and I think you will be like Michelle, and in time discover that it's actually a better thing.
I hope that you find a teaching job soon. Are you getting paid for your writing? (I'm going to go and check out the website you listed). I would imagine that the most frightening part would be the change in the economic situation (at least that is what it would be for me). hey, I'd be happy to have you on my L'Bri team if you want to earn some spending money!
I'm glad you are enjoying the dating scene. (I think that would scare me as well, but then again I'm old and it's been a LONG time since I've been on that scene.)
I'll be thinking of and praying for you. Let us know how we can be of help to you.
Barbara
__________________ L'Bri Pure n Natural, the aloe based skincare that is unparalleled in quality, value, safety, benefits and RESULTS at a fraction of the cost of other professional lines.
www.bgeatches.lbri.com
I'm proud of you! Way to go in letting your ex know that you have moved on and you are okay and despite what I'm sure he thought, he is not the be all, end all. Good for you!
Barbara
__________________ L'Bri Pure n Natural, the aloe based skincare that is unparalleled in quality, value, safety, benefits and RESULTS at a fraction of the cost of other professional lines.
www.bgeatches.lbri.com
It did feel pretty great to say that too him. Now I have another problem though. He all of a sudden wants to go from having Sadie 3 days a month, to having her every other week! When I asked him why the change all of a sudden he just says he wants to see her more. I think he has a hidden agenda, like is wanting to get out of paying child support. What are your guy's thoughts on this??? I told him we can try it, but if she starts getting behind in school, or gets sick from not enough sleep (he lets her stay up really late) then it will go back to the way it was.
It did feel pretty great to say that too him. Now I have another problem though. He all of a sudden wants to go from having Sadie 3 days a month, to having her every other week! When I asked him why the change all of a sudden he just says he wants to see her more. I think he has a hidden agenda, like is wanting to get out of paying child support. What are your guy's thoughts on this??? I told him we can try it, but if she starts getting behind in school, or gets sick from not enough sleep (he lets her stay up really late) then it will go back to the way it was.
his lawyer (or someone) told him the more days he has her the less child support he pays. At least here in Michigan, there so many overnites and then the father is due a credit on his support. OR he will most likely go to court and ask for no child support since he has her 1/2 the time.
Yeah, that is what I think he is trying to do. Sneaky, sneaky. We didn't use lawyers, did the divorce by ourselves. So...don't think he has a lawyer helping him, more like his girlfriend and family. Well...I think here in WA, he has to take me back to court to get the support modified. I will call my case worker to be sure. GRRRRRR.....he makes me so angry!!!
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